I found Michael Kimmel’s piece Masculinity as Homophobia to be interesting. The part that stuck
out to me was the idea that men are most fear being laughed at and ridiculed. I
would content that this may not be just about trying to be masculine. The desire
to not be rejected is not just a male issue. This seems to be fairly universal
to all people to not want to be made fun of. And the idea that men commit
suicide mainly based on feeling less manly seemed a bit far fetched to me. Excluding
mental illness financial issues and personal ones are prevalent to suicide. I
am doubtful a man who is suicidal is going to leave a note saying he offed
himself because he didn’t feel masculine enough. He would be more likely to
leave a note saying he blew all his money and his wife left him because he was
a drunk not because he didn’t feel manly enough. I don’t know this article was
an interesting read but just isn’t sitting with me well.
Interesting take on the article Greg, they are certainly not all going to hit home. I agree that some of it did seem a bit far fetched, but I think some of it made a lot of sense. I definitely think men often deal with trying to prove their masculinity and that sometimes not being masculine enough can be a problem. There are a lot of social pressures in high school to not be thought of as gay, or in your adult years to be strong for the family, a provider, and other things the article mentioned. So though I still agree some of it may be a stretch, a lot of it are things we should keep in mind, especially when teaching in the classroom. Or in the scenario you provided, perhaps ask why he blew all his money and was drinking? Perhaps he wasn't meeting expectation. Just food for thought! Good/thought provoking post.
ReplyDeleteI do see your point Brad. I think perhaps I had a bit of a knee jerk reaction. There are valid points especially the ones you mention. I was not intending to downplay that by any means. I see how it relates in a classroom setting and I guess also in a larger sense as well.
ReplyDeleteI agree that probably all people want to avod being laughed at and, although I am not a male, I also thought that some of the assumptions in the article were a little far-fetched. I think the whole descriptions of boys separating from their mothers,and seeing their fathers in a sexual way but not being able to act on it (and thus creating homophobia) was a little contrived. I'm sure that they do look to their fathers to form a large part of their identity and determine what it means to be a man, but I have a hard time believing the rest of it. I did find the discussion of power interesting though. Again, the norm is defined by a priviledged group of people, effectively shutting everyone else out.
ReplyDeleteI totally understand Greg, I had a similar reaction as well. Like you and Sue, I certainly found some of it to be far-fetched. Interesting read, like you said!
ReplyDeleteEveryone has really great points here. It definitely is not just a male thing to want to be accepted and fit in, so in that, the article is somewhat flawed. It does seem to be an over generalization to say that a man committed suicide for not being "manly" enough. However, Brad has a good point in that some things like being considered gay, or not being a good provider to his family, can be considered "not manly". And those are both common reasons why men commit suicide. Very interesting!
ReplyDeleteAll of these comments are so great and I definitely agree with each of you. Greg, I can see where you might have difficulty seeing that point but I think what he was saying is that it's more of an underlying emotional issue that can lead to other things. That's just how I saw it! Sue, I also found the whole Oedipus concept to be really kind of out there in terms of the rest of the article. I didn't quite see where it fit in, especially because most of Kimmel's other ideas are so much more modern and more applicable, I think.
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